Sitting at the bar. Watching as my battery slowly dies. Dr. Pepper finished (I KNOW not coffee... but I work here and have already had my cup when I came in to work @ 10 am). Sipping on ice water. Nothing much going on. Nothing much going on.

I am in reflect mode, which is always... well not always... but many times a fun place to be.

And the musings are not telling me much. I feel like life is going by too quickly and I am not really anywhere I actually want to be. Yet. I feel like waiting for this divorce has just put my life on a major hold, and I am truly, truly ready for it to be over.

But my lawyer... she is awful about returning my emails. Ah! But she has time to send me email forwards. Which is odd of a lawyer anyway. I never send her any ~ just to clarify.

And now my little brother and sister are talking to me on IM. They're 14 and 11. They love me. And mom is making them journal (which I do of my own accord obviously!), so they are bored and sending me messages. Silly kiddos.

Thanksgiving's almost here! :-D My ultimate FAVORITE holiday!! AND better news, I get the kiddo. Pretty excited about that :) I love my little man.

Honestly, HE is reason I still believe in love.

Today at work my favorite couple came in. I work at a coffee shop. And we have this couple that come in about everyday. The man is kinda nerdy looking... kinda reminds me of a timid bird. His wife is the most southern and sweetest woman ever. Always refers to me as Honey and sweet.

Every day he comes in and gets a small snickers latte with whip (but no sprinkles or chocolate syrup) his wife normally gets a small hot tea, and a muffin or scone. They just brighten up my day. He loves her so much and really who wouldn't? It's like being able to not love Paula Dean!! She sounds just like her.

I don't know much about them. I do know she plays piano for weddings and funerals. I know they love each other and he always looks at her like he'd do anything for her and wants to take care of her. It's beautiful. It's simple. What life should look like.

So they, or at least the tiny bit of their life that is shared with me, are a good example of how love should look. And something I suppose when it comes down to it I strive for. Love is something I struggle with, because there is so much involvement in life that to unselfishly give your love away isn't easy. It isn't for the faint of heart.

And I know my heart is beating, but sometimes I wonder how strongly.